Thank goodness for this board and my best friend. I think I am a little better now.
However, I did screw up and asked her to tell me truthfully if she had contacted her "friends" since I asked her not to last time. She said she did but that I have nothing to worry about it was only a couple of silly e-mails. My best friend chewed me out for even caring if she did. I thought asking was better than snooping. He also told me to quit "needing" things from her. He has been through a very similar sitch and knows what not to do. I keep trying to change her into an honest, responsible person and that isn't my job. Only my W can control that. I see the changes she needs to make as so simple but her problems are very ingrained.
I keep thinking our problems are so close to over but that just isn't the case. I am not angry, just disappointed. I will distance a little bit now and let her "float". When I know she is still contacting them it makes me not like her very much so the distancing is easy. I keep trying to "logic" her back but that isn't working. I just keep trying way too hard. Hopefully in the near future either she will rededicate 100% or I won't care that she didn't.
Kaw, I am glad I could help last week.
You are right, it is progress that she gave details of where she was going. She also quit her volleyball team to spend more time with the family. Bear with my pessimism but she has done positive things before only to remain in limbo land. Most times once the WA starts back home it is a "snowball" effect but with my W I have seen good signs before only to be disappointed. I feel like the little boy who kept hollering "WOLF" only my version is "SHE'S BACK!, she is still contacting them, SHE'S BACK, she is still contacting them". Like I said my patience with that is very thin now and it is quickly becoming choice time. I will not force a choice but will gradually just fade away.
