Kaw prompted me to start this so I did to potentially help any one in a similar sitch.
Looking at the "big picture", I should be pretty happy with my sitch. I am not. I am frustrated, confused, and a little angry so forgive me. I am disappointed in my W judgement and values. She had a bad case of "MLC", "Passion", "Identity Crisis", etc. and made some very poor choices with no remorse. She didn't have a PA but she tried and there were some internet EA's. Can someone PLEASE "link" my old thread so I can skip the ugly details. Anyway, how she handled herself and her lying nature are really bothering me. I would feel better if she had just pursued her new life and abandoned me instead of trying to have her cake and eat it too. The reason for this is now I just can't get comfortable. I keep waiting for the next bomb to drop. She just doesn't seem to be like any other WAW on this board anywhere. She treats me great and then I find out that she is still contacting EA's. I feel very strung along. I know this sounds very depressing but that is where I am at right now.
Everyone who has followed my posts is probably very confused right now because I am usually talking about the great times my W and I have. The problem is I am beginning to wonder if I could do this with anyone and it really isn't that special. I do feel quite positive 90% of the time but my tolerance is gone. I can't deal with another bout of MLC. That is my demon that I live with.
Don't feel bad friends if I don't respond to many peoples' threads. My feeling is that many of your spouses don't deserve you and if they continue to act like they have been they need to be shown the door. My life only improved once I "laid down the law", so that is the only proven guidance that I have. That is not good DBing so I am keeping those comments here only.
I have let my R consume me for 6 months so I am backing off a bit. I am taking care of all the other aspects of my life. She can pursue me and to be honest she has been for the last 2 weeks. That is all I know.
