Do you know the concept of self fulfilled prophesy? It almost universally is applied to pessemistic thinking. Self sabotage. Do the opposite. You're not going to be any worse off if you're wrong. You already know what he did - you've been through it. Vouch for him, respect him. Think positively about him. Honor him.
When it comes down to it, YOU are building him up to be untrustworthy, not because he IS, but because you are scared that if you trust him and he does it again, you will be responsible for your pain because you had the choice to protect yourself by not trusting him. You can either protect yourself, or you can work towards recovering your M. Which do you want? GH says it all the time, there's significant emotional risk in recovering your M. He doesn't have to make you feel secure and help you through your pain, YOU have to be willing to take on these issues and hope he'll accompany you on this journey. You NEED to do it either way, unless you want to repeat history over with different players.
You can do this, I know you can. Sorry that we're all being so harsh - it's easy to see and to say these things, but from the other side, it just doesn't click into place until it does. Don't just hang in there, be ambitious. Proactive. Forge ahead. You'll be nothing but happy you did!
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
