Everyone else pretty much nailed the other stuff but I do have to add one little thing...
Quote: What keeps going through my head, "How could I ever be with him in a loving manner after he has been with someone else.
Again, I have NOT been with you from the beginning, nor have I read your sitch but I am going to assume that before you, he slept with someone else. Even if he didn't, just about every one of our wives and husbands here were "with" other people before we got with them. Somehow we manage to still have sex with them. This is no different. Really, once you get past the mental issues, and that's no small task, the "how do I be with him when he's been with her" part is just a matter of realizing that he was with one or more "hers" before he met you so his level of contamination is not much different now than it was before. Again, if he SAYS you are his first, then maybe things are a little different and you will have to understand that for many people who get married, the fact that they are not their spouses first and only sex partner in life is a given and it's a non-issue.
Please, go into the weekend with as much PMA as you can manage and try to stay positive. It's all about having fun right now and I think you can do that, no?
