Quote: Will you PROMISE me that you won't bring up anything negative AT ALL? If you THINK negative thoughts you'll excuse yourself and go to the bathroom or something, splash water on your face or do whatever to move your mind back to THE PRESENT?
CROSS MY HEART HOPE TO DIE!!!!!!!
Thanks Frank . . .
I was actually just coming here to say:
Well now that I have done my whining and gotten all that out. Sat around and felt scared and angry and worried about seeing my H. I realized that Amy is right in what she said to me about if I can't change the situation how can I change things.
I am just going to NOT think about how I will react to my H's presence in the household until he's here. Then I am going to keep up my DBing and NOT bring up the OW or how much he hurt me OR how worried I am about our R.
I'm not sure exactly what we'll do. We thought about trying to take in a movie (not sure that what we wanted to see is playing here this weekend though.) And he already agreed to take me to Wal-Mart (grocery shopping here I come . . LOL!)
Quote: Geeze, get off this topic would you? If he's talking to you, thinking about you, trying to rebuild the relationship with you then he has ALREADY compared you with her and guess what - he thinks you're the better choice! Get a clue here would you?
THANK YOU . . . I try to tell myself that ALL the time! But for some odd reason I won't listen until someone else says it for me!
Quote: And your answer is? Well?
Here, let me help you. "I could be with him in a loving manner by appreciating who I am and who he is, and looking towards the future we will have together as parents and lovers". Does that help? Now YOU tell me your answer to the question.
Still trying to figure this one out EXACTLY! Your answer was very good . . . I'll let you know once I have my own worked through!
Quote: Understood. I remember how bad I felt thinking I might 'catch something' from her after we started to be intimate again. I even asked her if I should be concerned - and told her how I never thought I would ever be asking my wife such a question. It hurt.
But It passes. It will pass faster if you let it go.
You got it! It's sort of a big issue for me because I am trying to pin-point birth control options (sorry if it seems to be TMI here) and I want to sort of include him in the process. BUT obviously regular birth controls (the shot/pill/patch/IUD) don't protect against STD's.
He doesn't have anything right now because when one of my test came back screwy (in May . . don't know if I ever brought it up here) he went out and got tested for STD. And obviously my DR. retested me . . . I am clean therefore he must be.
I feel awful that I can't trust that I won't get an STD from my own H . . . but I can't. So anyway. . . . . I'm glad that I'm not the only one who's felt this way. I thought maybe I was being cold hearted.
