HI MATTIE! It does make you feel good having a house full of young people to laugh and talk with. I remember those days from when my boys were growing up. AH,YOUTH!!
Everything you said makes sense! No one would here would ever think you were nuts (but I do understand you feeling like that..been there a LOT of times..and still ocassionally feel like I must be a little nutty!!)!! You are a very strong woman and you have held it together wonderfully well but you are HUMAN (remember telling me that a few months back [Big Grin] ?)!! It is natural to have those feelings. My H has been working nights again for a few weeks and his hours are horrendous..he's worn out half the time and there are a lot of times when he is just mentally and physically whipped. I do understand (refuse to make the mistake I made over a year and a half ago by acting as if it is his fault he has to work so much!)and most of the time I really honestly do understand but then every once in a while that little "voice" in my head decides to see if it can cause me some trouble and makes me think things I shouldn't [Eek!] !! I work hard to ignor it but at times I feel a little sad. But it doesn't last long.
You know your H better than anyone and you have to determin what is the best course of action for you and your R. You have DB'd him to death and it has not gotten you very far so I understand that you feel the need to do something "drastic". Yes,it could possibly backfire but at least you would know for sure where things stand. You have reached a point where you have to do whatever it takes to "wake" him up!! Sometimes all they understand is a "blow to the head" [Big Grin] !!
You think about it and then do what YOU feel is the right thing for YOU!! Let us know how things are going!!
Your Friend,Pat