You are right Montana...everyone's M is different,everyone's R is different and everyone's views and definitions of love are different. Some people go a lifetime never experiencing that "tingly" feeling and some people feel it for their mate forever. I still get a thrill when I look at my H or whenever he takes my hand. Some people may wonder how I can still feel that way after he cheated on me but all I know is that I do and it makes me happy. I lost it for awhile and so did he. But I am happy to say it's back. Does he get it? I really don't know but if he doesn't that doesn't mean he doesn't love me. All I know is he seems to like holding hands and snuggling and cuddling (even at our age [Big Grin] !!) The A scared us both and we have talked about how we both felt at the time and how we never want to feel that way again. Everyone has to do whatever works for them and their R. No one can know what it's like until they've "walked in your shoes". I don't think there is one meaning of LOVE...I think LOVE is whatever YOU feel it is. Even if your definition of LOVE is different from your S,that doesn't mean he/she doesn't love you. It's how you deal with the differences that matter. I think LOVE gets "comfortable" after so many years but the trick is to not let it get so comfortable that you start taking each other for granted (I think that's what my H and I did for awhile). Now we realize that and we do things to keep it from getting "boring" and "hum-drum" [Wink] !! Matilda,I am really really glad to hear that you are happy and that you are working on YOU!! I think you are a teriffic lady and I also think that you are strong and you are headed in the right direction. You keep making Matilda happy!! pfroglady