My near WAW did not walk out with the OM after I DBd my heart out with the support of several people here. Again, thanks.
Now, while W believes things are much better in our marriage, I do not. For me, the relationship is more frustrating than before her two affairs were exposed. In part this comes from the knowledge that while I was having to tolerate sexual frustration and denial for five years, she was investing herself in relationships with other men. And in part it comes from her apathy toward addressing the problem of her low sex drive. She posted a message two months ago seeking help with her low sex drive. She was given advice which included seeing a Doctor. She has not done so. She has been "too busy" to do so.
Our counselor gave us a series of nine questions to work through. It took me half an hour. In the same two months, she has yet to complete the nine questions.
She knows that sexuality has been an issue for five years. She knows that I now feel that I am playing third string. She says she wants to remain married to me and have a monogomous future. Yet she still thinks making love once every seven to ten days is alright, that simply not responding like some log is normal, and that I should not expect her to become arroused when I seem tentative.
Tentative? Our counselor has told me that I should not try to initiate intimacy. What kind of M is this?
My needs are being ignored and dismissed and I am about out of tolerance. My life is insufficient. With the more open communication that has come out of all this, the lack of the W initiative in addressing this only makes it all worse.
She admits chasing the OM. She only hugged me once in the past week.
