Mama, I think telling your H where you stand is great. Db-ing or not, it is perfectly ok to voice your stance to your H. Sometimes I thnk they fool themselves that the double life can continue, acting "as if" in a way I guess.
It all comes down to what makes you happy. While ultimately having an intact marriage is the goal, you have to take care of you and the kiddos first, I know you know that. So, stand tall, go see your folks for a few days if you need to, you are kicking a$$!
