I've posted very little here but have followed this board for a couple of years. Quite honestly, I wish I had found it a couple years before that. Maybe it could have saved my marriage, maybe not. But at least I would have tried back then to gain some respect back before the walls of resentment grew too high and thick to be penetrated.
I have a hard time understanding how you take it, and from your last comments, it seems you are nearing the breaking point. I can sure understand how you feel though regarding that you would rather stick needles in your eyes...
Looking back on some of your recent posts where your negative feelings are coming across loud and clear, every time I read them I think, that is exactly what your wife needs to hear. Namely, checking on your assumptions, how that relates to your confidence and also how you now have zero desire for her.
I think you need to tell her that there is no way you are going to check with her everytime you make a decision, that you are a man and a husband, not some child that needs to check with his "mommy".
I am curious, just what items does she check with you? Or is it just you that needs to check with her?
The imbalances in your relationship are huge and I know that you are aware of this.
I feel for you Hairy. I have always hoped I would check this site and find that you had made some great progress. Unfortunately, that seems so far away.
If your marriage is ever going to make it, or at least become somewhat happy, you are going to need to take some of the power back that you have given away over the years.
Isn't it ironic with strong willed controlling women (probably men too) that they want to continue to take and take and take the power over the years. Then, when they basically have all the power that they kept taking, they lose all respect for you.
