I just get accused of being a control freak, or not caring what she thinks, etc.
Are you being a control freak? Is it true that you dont care what she thinks? nope neither are true. boiiing, your rubber, she is glue.
If its not the truth, why even respond to it?
Then, even when I explain that I'm trying to be the "confident man" she desires, she'll then say that what I should have done was x, or what I should have said was y.
Im going to create a little scenario for you.
two drunks : <fighting> BF <jumps in the middle> : hey guys... listen... hey Im talking here. I work here you know. Stop that. you cant do that here. Im bigger then you. Look Im making a fist now. Look at my bicep. Im strong. two drunks : <continue fighting. smash idiot who jumped in middle, and hurt OP.> BF <laying on floor being kicked and trampled> : Seriously Im trying to be a tough guy here. Its my job. stop fighting. heello? are you listening to me? two drunks : <fighting, but now there is seven drunks fighting> BF : < on all fours, trying to pick up his teeth, with broken fingers and swollen eyes.> I sayd stofp it. Pleafe. Thef isf maya houfe.
------ yeah. sometimes explaining what you are trying to do, and talking about it, doesnt work so well.
Often, I can tell little difference between what I did and what she suggests I should have done. And what's the value of being confident, if you're just reciting or reenacting what your spouse says you should?
Exactly. No wonder they dont want to have to explain it to us. Where is the value in that?
