2nd Time Learning IV

[IWB]

Faith is difficult for me lately, and leaving it in the Lords hands has been too. I have gotten better in the past few days, and realize that going through the motions with prayers is important, even though it is labored. My thoughts and actions have not been very DBing like.



Thanksgiving was very rough at our abode, as arguments insued between W and D's over petty things. Her depression was high, and I realized this time of year is difficult for W. Unfortunately, it gets passed down.



W and oldest D got into it, and some things finally seemed apparent. The next day after the fight, W took oldest D to the store to buy her a Christmas dress. To me, it now seems that oldest D controls much of W, and perhaps drives some of her actions. Perhaps this is because she holds so much information about W's goings on?



Several weeks ago there was a senior recognition that I was eliminated from. This deeply hurt, since all other fathers were part of their child's recognition. I confronted oldest D about it, and she claimed I have not supported her. Where the heck did that come from. I have been more active in my children's lives than many fathers. I chalked this up to the poison W has spread about me to the girls, and for that matter, everyone she comes in contact with. This really has hurt me, since I worked so hard to be a good father, and my legacy is ruined. Sometimes I just want to crawl away forever, and I am in a downward spiral.