Tree-I'd like to read your threads-Where are they so I can start at the beginning and see what your story is all about. Just reading this one has peaked my interest, and I'd love some PMA as mine is in the pitts at best shall we say. Insecurities out the wazoo from H's affair-anxiety and panic so bad I am contemplating a leave of absense from work. That in itself sets me off-How can I be so irresponsible! What kind of nutcase lets this take over their life when H has said A is over and is not having any contact with her at all(how do we ever know that-will someone tell me please????) Now I dwell in the land of anxiety and am trying to keep my mouth shut when I want to ask a million questions to get that security we all crave after the discovery of an A. Andy...I've been good-no mention of her for over a week-almost 2!! I have duck tape in my pocket justincase I start to feel out of control with wanting reasurrance.. Do we ever ask for reassuranse, or just go by thier actions? H calls every day-tells me he loves me every day, wants sex just about every day, spends almost all free time with me, so....why can't I get past the betrayal thing?(a 2 1/2 yr affair) When he left for six months -the panic attacks set in and he's back and here I am at home instead of work because I went in-had instant panic and left. Every day its like this-I wanna be normal again!! My thread is in peicing-togehter again. Andy put it all in there since I was all over the place. Tell me how you got to where you are now Tree! Do I shut up and act "as if" or what? Oh yeah-we go to C too. I really screwed that one up last week-ranted and raved about the A for a whole 2 hrs! C was upset she let it get to that-regretted immediately all I had done and said when we left, and have not said a word about the A since. Where do they go though when you feel the distance? Sounds like you've come a long way and I'm an information gatherer-if you don't mind sharing. Rachel M.
