Thanks, Duchess. I can really use all the insights regarding this sitch I can get at this point. I agree with the depression theory. I've felt all along H is depressed. I plan to ask him to speak to the doctor about it next week. I'll put it in the context of "it couldn't hurt to just tell him what the symptoms are," and see if he'll go for it. I think he will. He likes being able to say to me, "see, I'll try anything to make things better."
Actually, I think I'm letting the intimacy thing get way out of control in my own mind. H still initiates; still wants things to "happen" between us. He's just afraid that things might not go well and that makes him feel "worthless as a man." He's already is dealing with those feelings in regards to having hurt me so much; along with feeling like a failure in all aspects of life.
I've already decided to back off and let him take the lead. I told him I don't want to put any pressure on him, but for him to just remember that I do desire and want him. In the past he felt I had lost my desire for him and THAT made him feel worthless as a man. I can't keep up with the male ego!!
Also, I think the main thing right now is his worries about his health. At least he's being proactive there: getting a stress-echo today and seeing the doc next week.
