If you were here right now I'd give you a great big kiss (on the cheek, of course ). I sure wish my H would call me "babe" again. I keep telling him it's the little things that count for so much. I'm going to reply on your thread.
Pfroglady,
I don't blame you for checking out your H's cell. I did that just last week myself, and his palm pilot, and the last time he had his work computer at home I checked that out also. What is really shameful is when I tried to break into his voice mail at work to see if he'd been getting any messages from her. Didn't try very hard, but was ashamed of myself nonetheless. I guess if they really thought about the consequences of what they were doing they MIGHT have had second thoughts. Who knows.
Well, I lost the battle of whether to ask my H about the name-thing via e-mail. Had to do it. I told him I had been expecting some sort of explanation or at least an appology for his slip-of-the tongue on the night of graduation. Afterall, it brought up very unpleasant things and made me feel like shit. I couldn't help wondering if he was thinking about her at a time that should have been a wonderful family celebration.
He replied stating that he knew that nothing he could say would make any difference, but that it must be just that the two names are very similar. It had nothing to do with what he was or wasn't thinking about. He appologized and said he felt awful if it ruined my evening. I'm not sure that helped me very much. Afterall, why THAT name.
I think I'm going a bit numb here. This is what I've been fighting in myself all along. I felt from day one that if we BOTH didn't work hard at this my feelings for him would start to die. That's not the case yet, but right now I just feel numb. He called a little while ago to tell me he's on his way home and said ILY as he was signing off. I just said "Bye." Couldn't even get ILY out of my mouth.
My PMA is low. Like I said earlier, it's probably a culmination of everything that's going on right now. Thing is, I don't even care that it's low. I don't even want to bring it back up right now.
![[Wink]](images/icons/wink.gif){kind=icon}
). I sure wish my H would call me "babe" again. I keep telling him it's the little things that count for so much. I'm going to reply on your thread.
