Thank you for the reply to my requst. I am trying to hold onto the stance that I am unable to rescue her. Even if I try, the rescuing will be short lived and we will have accomplished nothing. I agree with the statement about her confronting her fears. This has been coming for the last few weeks. She, I beleive, is seeing that she will not get her way and I will not give in. Not in a mean way. But again in the knowledge that she needs to pull asisde the veil and take a hard look at herself. I had to do this. It is horrible what you see. But knowing what I do know and have gleamed from others (You, BF, Lil, Chrome) you have to confront it then you have to move beyond it and build a better you that is dependant on only you. Do not take this the wrong way, through this process I may not save my marriage, b/c at this point it is not mine to save. But in doing this, I am actually allowing my wife to be herself again. She will, I hope, be able to build her true self again.
You are correct, I have done shameful and horrible things in 12 years. All of which I have apologized for to her. I have asked forgiveness from God, and importantly forgiven myself. I am not the knight in white, but rather the peasant trying to find his path.
Thanks Cobra.
F4W
Through honest giving of my love I will recieve 10 fold in return.
Just because a person does not love you in the way you want, does not mean they do not love you!
