Had a little time to start catching up on everone's situation. Forgive me for saying this, but I have felt all along that you are having to personally work too hard on your H's own recovery. I understand the guilt he feels, and the effects it has had on him. But it seems as if its time for him to start looking forward, and take that next step. He has a very caring and loving wife, he should be thankful for that alone.
quote:You need to tell him "I LOVE YOU...I FORGAVE YOU...If I WAS GOING TO LEAVE YOU I WOULD HAVE DONE IT LONG AGO...NOW DEAL WITH IT!!!!!!"
I have to agree with pfroglady on this one. Maybe you need to be this blunt with him. It seems as if he needs a slap in the face so to speak. Not literally, but you know what Im saying. If you're able to keep your bad feelings to yourself and not make him feel any worse than he already does, then there's no need in him hindering the recovery process any longer. If my W was as self-loathing as your H I dont know that I could take it. She is the strong one here, not me. She has made her own personal recovery from all this. I guess having the luxury of a 6 year time frame does help, that along with her faith in God. I hope all goes well at the C's and maybe he/she can get your husband back on the right track.
And that ANS guy, boy does he have a way with words. Andy you truly are insightful, whether you know it or not. Keep spewing out the knowledge, for it's a benefit to us all.
As always, my thoughts and prayers are with you,
Montana
Edit: BTW.....maybe you should give your H some of your own advice. As in the title of this thread. "I'll think about it tomorrow."
