Hi everyone. It's been a really long time since I've been here, but as usual, I gravitate back to this website when I'm uncertain as to what's going on in my marriage and what I need to be doing.
My husband came home in May of '05 after we were separated for almost a year. We almost got divorced in Jan of '05, but he changed his mind and then in May, came home to me. We've been in marriage counseling since November, and in general, I feel like things have been going pretty well, but for the past couple of months he's been stressed out and unhappy at his job and I feel a new distance between us. This time I don't feel like it's "me" or even our marriage, but more like his own unhappiness with his life and where he is at right now. (I guess that's more mid-life crisis stuff, something I feel he's been dealing with for several years now)
I guess my problem is that I feel kind of resentful that he's focused so much on his unhappiness and that he's focusing less on our marriage. At first, he seemed so gung-ho about our counseling and about trying to meet me halfway on things, but now he seems sort of "there" when we're at the counselor, but otherwise, off in his own little world.
I guess when this happens all I can do is try NOT to take it personally (easier said than done) and maybe redouble my efforts to focus on myself and building my own life outside of the marriage.
Still, I'd love to hear from anyone who's felt like this after their spouse came back, and how you dealt with it when he or she was suddenly distracted and unavailable again.
