"I'll think about it tomorrow!"

[healedbutscarred]

Matilda,for a while I would have these feelings that whenever my H was too tired or didn't feel like making love it was because of me. He tried to reassure me that it wasn't me but him. Then I would think it was him because he had little desire for me and he still wanted the OW. And of course I would obcess about "was she better in bed","did she have a better body",etc., etc.....
I told him of these fears and bless him,he tried so hard to make me understand that sometimes he is just too tired physically or mentally and sometimes he just isn't "in the mood" because (as he puts it) "he's getting older and he just doesn't have the desire as much as he used to". It took me a long time but I am better at sensing when he is really tired when he gets home and I can pretty much tell when he isn't really feeling "in the mood" and I try things to "get him in the mood" But I no longer feel that thoughts of the OW are in his mind and I no longer think that it is because of her when we don't make love. That is just one of the things that you have to really work hard on and it does get better with time (you are probably sick of hearing me say that!!). I am fortunate in that my H loves to cuddle and snuggle!! I hear a lot of women complaining that their H's aren't affectionate that way or they don't like to just cuddle up (especially at night). I am a "snuggler"!! I am also one of those women that would make love everyday if H wanted too!! Can't help it.....guess I am a sex maniac !!!! Anyway,I am content with the amount of loving I get and I am happy to just be in my H's arms when I go to bed at night!! Sex isn't everything and I realize that because the love making has slowed down a little doesn't mean that he loves me any less or desires anyone else. It just took me awhile to convince my brain !! He assures me that I am satisfying ALL his wants,needs,desires and fantasies!! He's taking REAL GOOD CARE of mine too !!