Haven’t posted in about a week. Not much to report, I suppose, so I’ll just respond to the kind people that have posted to my thread.
Greenbar,
Like you, things are pretty much on a plateau with me. I mentioned my W considering getting a blood test, but haven’t heard anything since. I’m guessing that she’s feeling a little better, and will not go through with it. She’s currently on estrogen/progesterone, which seems to help some of her symptoms, but does nothing for her libido. Not sure if it helps her moods because she’s still pretty closed mouthed.
In the past, she’s been very open with me about her moods and feelings – even during periods of PMS. But in the past year, she’s chosen to keep it all to herself. It became “personal.” I’ve tried to open communications, but it ain’t happening.
Of course, you’re right about the psychological aspects. I don’t really know which came first, the psychological (combined with encouragement from the SSW), or if it was triggered by hormones. My W’s behavior isn’t overly erratic except that she suddenly became aware of her mortality, and wants to “live life.” She doesn’t want to spend her life waiting for the day when we can afford to do things, and end up dying before this happens.
In that respect, it’s kinda hard to argue. But, I want to balance the present with future planning. She does too, but we tend to disagree with where that balancing point should be.
The biggest stickling point right now is that I want to do more things with her. The problem is that our youngest son is autistic, so it’s difficult to do. Again, it’s hard for me to argue that we should do more together since it would mean sticking our other kids with babysitting duties, thus robbing them of their childhood.
Before anyone tells me to get outside babysitting, I have to say that we do things together. We do things with other couples only. The kinds of things I want to do such as golfing, biking, walks, etc. seem to necessarily involve other people. In fact, they don’t necessarily involve me!
At this point, I don’t believe face-saving is an issue. It’s just that she doesn’t want to make an effort to do things with me, and doesn’t want me to make the effort either. (sigh)
quote:Originally posted by greenbar: But hopefully in your case (and in mine), things will eventually move out of this MLC/Menopause lunacy. We have no control over the process but what we can do is hope for positive results.
AMEN to that!
quote:Originally posted by greenbar: Even then, I'm fairly certan that she did not mention her lack of sexual drive (which is why it took several months for the Dr. to determine the need to prescribe the Progesterone--he can only treat symptoms he knows about--he only knows what she tells him)
Me too. And though she mentioned getting checked out, I’m starting to doubt that she will. Another thing is that I don’t think she ever had her estrogen/progesterone levels, nor her testosterone, nor andrenalin, or any other hormone tested. She has not seen an OB/GYN. Only her family doctor who listened to her symptoms (the ones she told her about), and prescribed BPCs. Since W has not returned with any more complaints, I guess the doctor assumes it’s working.
Like Lily said…
quote:Originally posted by lily: First ya gotta get 'em to go thru the door, right Andy? If it was your child you'd make the appt and haul 'em in. . .the spousie has to make the move for him/herself.
From her perspective, things are fine. So, why should she bother?
