I don't believe that "once a cheater, always a cheater." There are S's who cheat once and never do it again. Some don't realize how much pain they have caused until it's over and then they wake up and realize what they could have lost. They are grateful that they have a second chance and won't cheat again. There are people who learn from their mistakes.

One thing I have seen is that there are women (and maybe men too but I have only observed women doing it) who set out to get a man and don't care who they hurt in the process. They don't care if he is married or has a family. They want him and that is all that matters. They do homework on the guy. Find out his likes and dislikes and begin to be the "perfect woman" for him. I saw one woman in an office where I worked who began to watch sports, changed her perfume, brought homemade goodies to the office, laughed at his jokes, offered to help him after hours with his work, asked him to help her find a car, etc, etc, etc. We couldn't believe he couldn't see through this, but he was blind as a bat when it came to her. She totally set him up. Sometimes affairs don't happen because the person goes looking. Sometimes they happen because the OP set things up for the H to fall.

I bet each one of us if we were real scum could think about someone we know that we could do this to and get an affair started. Especially if you don't put a time frame on it.

There are people who will never cheat no matter what the temptation. I would like to think I'm one of those who never will, but we don't know for sure what we will do until that temptation hits us. I pray that temptation won't come my way.

I used to think I could never forgive my H if he cheated, but I know now that if he were truly sorry and I felt I could trust him again, then I would give him another chance. If you feel you can trust him again, then don't let these people influence you in another direction. [Smile]

Hart

Hart