Thanks, Matilda.

Yeah, things are cool, but I hafta admit that I still want things to get hot [Wink] I gave up looking for little signs a long time ago. I get down when W ignores me for awhile. I feel better when she makes some sort of effort.

I know it sounds pathetic, but yesterday she went for a walk, and asked me along. That felt good. The other night, she told me some stuff that she was told in confidence. It’s these small things that make all the difference.

BTW, the confidence that I spoke of was from TF’s W (TF is my troubled friend that I referred to in other threads). She cut him off from sex as punishment for being grumpy. W finds this very distasteful. I think it’s horrible.

As to me, I still miss the affection. W isn’t punishing me. She just doesn’t want it. I think that hurts even more than if she was being vindictive. I feel so undesirable and unloved when the only one who initiates a hug is me. I feel awful when she never says ILY, and only responds with a grunt or a nod when I say it.

I’ve noticed that this happens more often when she’s particularly tired, so I try to prepare myself.

The flow isn’t necessarily a good thing, but I have to go with it. When – like this weekend – the flow goes my way (sorta), then it’s easier.

I’m not looking for “happy ever after.” But I guess some sort of effort on her part would be nice.

Just have to manage my expectations I suppose. A coupla weeks ago, she told me that she thought I was waiting for her to change, and that it wouldn’t happen. I denied it, but I suppose she’s right

Just gotta stay [Cool] while I wait it out.

Andy

Andy