There isn't an answer for that question. I guess she means what she is saying at that particular point in time, but may feel differently later? I think we all realize that words spoken in anger are often not the true feelings, so I guess that is all we have to go on. Confusion in W's mind will cause her to say contradictory things...I know I get that a lot from my H.
Try asking for confirmation that what you "hear" is what she "said". I have come to realize that after being together 16 yrs, my H makes a lot of assumptions and has often decided what I was going to say or how I was going to react in advance. It's a major roadblock to communication.
