I may not have been very clear with you. Maybe I can clarify if I'm not on the right track.
I've always wanted to be able to share everything & not hold anything back from my husband. I want a honest, deep & open connection with him where I feel safe to simply Be myself. But that's not my nature, I hold back. It's a self-protective thing, most of us do it. Also, it requires that we do feel safe & have a deep trust in them to be able to open up.
In my case, my husband has been very hurt by this. When I hold things in, he feels as if I'm hiding things, or that I'm not able to share with him so deeply. I understand this & agree with him. But, I've also come to see that sometimes we share things that perhaps it's best left unspoken. Sometimes, we talk to relieve our own guilt or to make ourselves feel better.
Things like that can & often do lead to misunderstanding & hurt feelings. It's a fine line what we really need to share with them & what not to. I didn't mean to imply that we should let it all hang out. I simply thought in your case that your wife wants you to be more open with her. Sharing intimately like that is a challenge then because we are so vulnerable in those moments, but the rewards are extraordinary in bringing a couple closer together. That's what I was getting at.
