I know you can detect when I get frustrated but I will spare you the necessity of reading through a long post and go ahead and tell you I am getting perturbed.
If I were to ask you what screwed up your marriage I would guess that your answer would be "the affair".
The affair is NOT what screwed up your marriage.
It began long before that and the only part you have any control over is that part that you contributed.
THAT is why this is about you and changing yourself.
You CAN pray that AS YOU ARE CHANGING your wife's heart will be turned back to you and your family will be restored but you can not pray that God will just magically change your wife's will. Our wills are largely formed by the things we like, dislike, want and need. I'm sorry but right now your wife doesn't like you a whole lot. Notice "want" is BEFORE "need"....because we often have to get burned by the fires from many of the things we "want" just to learn about what we REALLY "need"...
Do you even realize that you really do have some issues?
I am not being mean to you but every one of us that's here, has issues and are either in the very early process of discovering what they are or we are in the process of working through them.
So far, your entire goal is just to get your wife back.
Well, what the hell are you gonna do with her when she gets there?!!
You haven't changed.
Sure you have hurt, but that's not the same.
SHE sure doesn't seem to have changed much at all for the better.
YOU can't change her.
YOU MUST WALK through your own crap and clean it up.
You can't just ask God to let you track it back through the house!
Your wife has to do the same.
You CAN NOT assist her on her journey and keep pushing yours to the back burner.
Hasn't God gotten your attention yet?
He shaking the hell out of your cage and all He's getting in return is a prayer that He will change HER?!
Man, let Him change YOU.
What if you are the one that He planned to reach HER THROUGH???????
