Your wife has nothing that you need but YOU need to stop talking to her about anything other than picking up the kids. I really wish you would stop letting her walk all over you where they are concerned. As I told another poster last night, Dads are NOT free babysitters.
Amen, sister. I actually told her this last night, sans the dads as babysitter portion, regarding limiting our interaction to the pickup/dropoff/swap of our children b/c our interaction had become VERY strained and I did not want that type of R with her. I also told her that since she wasn't OK with how I had been treating her lately (calling her on her BS regarding our children), I told her that she would not be subjected to questions or comments regarding her life unless her actions directly impacted our children.
YOU TALK TOO MUCH! Sorry, but it is the truth. You know that saying about beating a dead horse? You've done that, now it's 6 feet under. STOP TALKING. JUST DO IT. You don't owe her any further explanations. She wants you out of her life, you're out. Make your arrangements for the kids. Follow through but don't be a doormat ANYMORE.
HH, you are not going to win her back by being at her beck and call, patting her head when she hurts or taking the kids everytime she wants to hit the streets. You're going to win her back by being the man that God created you to be. I assure you, He never intended for you to lose your "jewels" but since you willingly gave them up...here's the mason jar, reach inside and grab them and be the man that you are: redeemed, resurrected and restored to live out HIS will for your life. Not HERS.
I'll put it to you like this: there's a time to fight, you're fighting for your respect and dignity, neither of which she acknowledges you deserving or possessing - so embrace your inner jackass and let him out if necessary. DEFEND YOURSELF! WITHOUT WORDS. It means stop taking her crap! WALK AWAY. Not from her, but from her behavior and treatment of you so if that means you walk out of her presence, SO BE IT! You DON'T DESERVE to be treated this way but only can change it. She'll ride this thing as long as you will let her.
STOP TALKING.
GAL.
When you stay grounded in His Word you won't totally let go because you will be constantly claiming His WILL for your marriage. It will become your very breath. SHE doesn't need to know any of that for it to change HER.
