I just want you to know that I did reveiw the documnets again and they were right so I went ahead and signed. I know that I probably should have made him wait just out of spite, but the way I looked at it was the sooner it is done and over with the sooner I can get on with my life (if he lets me). He asked me when we were done if he could walk me out and I replied if you choose. Then when we were outside I told him that I felt like he was presurring me and I also asked him why he cared if I hated him, or was mad at him, or whatever other feeling (negative) that he doesn't want me to feel.And his reply was because whether I like it or not he does still care about me and always will. I told him that he showed absolutly no emotion while he was signing the papers, which to be honest I really don't know because he had his head down the whole time except he was staring at me when I was signing and crying at the same time. I couldn't hold it back while I was signing or while we were in the lawyer's actual office.
Well last night when he got off the phone with me he said ILY and called me baby once again, but today I was just sweetie. I think he puts up a front at work so that all the guys there don't think he is hurting. I just think that it is over between us and I guess I have to start posting on the another BB right.
I guess I really lost the fight. So what now? How am I suppose to act around him? The way our track record is I don't know when to try again or if to try again? I asked him last night (which I know that I shouldn't have) "How do you know when you try again a year down the road, 2years or 3 years. How do you knwo" and his response to that was it just has to happen." What is that suppose to mean? I asked him if he was coming to see the kids today and he said that it depends on how tired he was when he gets off and that he needs to start winging the kids off of the everyday visits, but it is just as hard for him to do it too. Someone please help me with these questions.
