You're absolutely right, Matilda. I wonder how many of us have done this to ourselves???

It also makes me think of how my W used to say that she wasn't going to let me "do it" to her.

I think - in a way - I've "done it" to myself, and W is "doing it" to herself.

It's kind of a marriage ping-pong game.

I like Lily's quote that "I'd rather be happy than right."

Maybe that's the way to drop out of the game. Just cede defeat. It's not worth it to "win."

Andy