And you are right, it is when I got unhappy that my H felt he couldn't do it anymore, and looked for "happy" elsewhere
Think this is soooooo true. I think when we are unhappy, or expressed our unhappiness...our spouse sees and feels that it is their failure to make us HAPPY. Don't think they go all out to find happiness elsewhere...but it is an escape for them. I think in my sitch...things got kinda ugly because I constantly nagged and complained about how unhappy I was, how fed-up I was blah blah blah. And it drove H away. My own diagnosis is that he felt that he was a failure and couldn't do anything right. Couldn't make his wife or children happy (yes, I complained about kids "not knowing" him anymore blah blah blah) and it created a void in him....and here comes ow who listens to him, appreciates him, and is happy with his company... Wham bam...and that is the start of my roller coaster ride. I agree with Grasshopper that we need to be AWARE of what we are doing. THink alot of times, when we are togehter with our partner for long, we tend to lose focus of ourselves, our Rs and we tend to go on auto-pilot, and thus the taking-for-granted comes in. AWARENESS is indeed important!!
