Quote: "W, I have some things to talk about with you. We may disagree, and continue this discussion over a length of time. But I trust, and hope you do too, that we will be able to work it out for our relationship to become even stronger. When is a good time for you sweetheart?"
This is a PERFECT, real world example to follow up my last "thought" post. I have tried this and been met repeatedly with "What is it. Just say it now, I have to xxx right now." When I respond with "No, it's not something that I need to, or want to discuss right now. When would be better?" She tries to adopt a tone of sincerity (probably thinking I am stewing...or KNOWING I am) and says, "No, really, lets talk now. I don't want to do it later. I'll be tired, etc."
Point is that no matter HOW I approach anything that seems like a general "R" talk, or expression of my feelings, she shuts it down, or minimizes it as something to just "get out of the way" so she can go about her daily life. This was BEFORE the affair. Now it is even worse, but I think with me starting to open up (she told me that she didn't EVER think I was doing that in the past, which was a bit of an eye opener because I thought I was...boy, was I wrong) we can get things moving in a more productive, constructive direction.
