I'm with you on that one, Gwyn. Perhaps that's the reason that I didn't waste any time making my H "earn" me back. He wanted back in, I grilled him until I felt comfortable that he was remorseful for what he did, and I let him back in. It all happened in the same day -- the same few hours, actually -- and I don't regret doing it that way.
Every time my H looks into our son's eyes, I see H's pain.
When I used to tell on my sister for doing something mean to me, my mom, without fail, would shake her head and say, "'Revenge is mine,' sayeth the Lord."
H is learning that lesson the hard way now. Bad deeds in fact do not go unpunished. But "punishing" is not ours to do.
