Time for an update.

I’m not quite sure where to begin. What’s this thread called? Oh yeah, Burying the past.

Some people took exception to the title. Perhaps Kent was more accurate when he told me that I should let it (the past) go. Anyway, bury it or let it go… semantics. My problem is that I want to leave the past in the past, but somehow couldn’t get W’s mind out of the past.

A recent development illustrates my point, and happily, I think shows some headway.

For awhile now, W has been drooling over motorcycles. I’ve always wanted us to get bikes when we could afford them. It’s always been a future dream of mine – for both of us. But, it seems to have turned into something between her and MF (he’s getting one).

Well, a couple of weeks ago, she informed me that she’s been saving for one. Has almost $1,000 saved. Fine. I can swallow that. Maybe by the time she can afford one, she’ll deign to discuss her dreams and maybe even include me in them.

This weekend, she asks S#1 and me to go look at the bikes at the local dealership. Nice. I guess maybe she’s starting to allow me into the club. We can go and drool at bikes together. Well, while we’re there, she keeps saying, “So, do we buy it now?” I thought she was joking around, but on the way home, she asks me how she should pay for it, (our) line of credit, or does she (me) take out a loan. I had no answer so she asked, “Don’t you want any input on it?” I told her that frankly, I don’t think we can afford it yet, but if she’s going to go ahead, it doesn’t matter to me how she (me) pays for it.

We later discussed payment options. I was determined not to get in her way. 20 rolls of duct tape!

I couldn’t believe that she’d unilaterally decide to make a major purchase like this for herself without even mentioning it to me. She just presented it to me as a done deal. Whatever happened to her assertion that we could “talk about anything. The lines of communications are always open.”?

So. Again, I sucked it in.

Well. This morning, she asked me if I felt like she was going after the bike behind my back. I said, “kinda.” She told me that in view of the way things were this summer (between us), she didn’t feel like she could talk to me about it. She said it had become a dream of hers and she thought I would resist it all the way. She said she was “pleasantly surprised” when I didn’t.

D’ya think she’ll finally bury the perception that I’m an impediment to her happiness? Can she bury that part of our past?

I’m hoping that this incident will prove to her that she can bury/let go of the past. Even this past summer.

BTW, Fille. Remember how you laughed when I commented that I was usurping someone else's (tree’s?) thread? Right back at ya [Big Grin]

Andy

Andy