No. I won’t forget it. I never toss advice aside. However, I think I’ll have to shelf it for now.
I enjoy running my fingers up and down her arm. But, I have to stop myself because it tickles and irritates her. I like to take my time, too. She doesn’t. Don’t know if it’s fatigue, but whether it is sex, or just cuddling, she acts like she’s waiting to get it over with.
But, when I back off, she seems to appreciate it. I’ve backed off a little lately, and lately, she’s been lingering a little – even pulling me towards her, when I hug/kiss her. I make sure I pull away before she does. Don’t want to overstay my welcome, so to speak. But, she is trying. In view of the fact that she’s trying not to lead me on, I think this is good. I don’t think its pride that makes her hold back. It seems to be more a matter of fear that I’ll start pushing again.
I have to admit that I’m having a hard time understanding the “emotional stuff.” W used to want the physical “stuff.” By that, I mean caresses, hugs, kisses, holding hands, etc. Not just sex. I thought we were supporting each other emotionally, too. I supported her when she felt criticized by her parents, by society (for being “only” a mother – not working), I told her ILY a lot.
But, she said that I did all of this in accordance with my schedule. On my terms. It makes it kinda hard for me to reintroduce any lovey-dovey stuff because it’s what I want.
I think you’re right, Matilda. I think that deep down, she wants to be closer, but at the same time, she doesn’t want to feel used.
I also think that she’s still afraid that if she gives me an inch, I’ll think I’m a ruler.
