If he told you he would come home only for "us," not merely for the kids, believe it. For a long, long time I thought my h came home only because his apartment lease was up and he missed the kids. It took me a long time to have faith him. It influenced how I related to him.
Dont' make that mistake! I think any insecurity you feel communicates itself to the other person and can make you look clingy and unappealing. That, or you act kind of mean because you don't yet trust the other person.
He's home for you. He had the guts to leave once and to stay away--if he comes home for you, believe him!
And yes while you are happy to have him back, remind yourself about 5 times a day that HE is the lucky one--you took him back when a lot of women might not have and you stood by him when a lot of women might not have. That makes you worth your weight in gold!!!! He's the lucky one, Lisa. Don't you forget that.
There probably are some good reconciliation books out there, you might do a search on Amazon. Also, most of the DB advice still applies: do what works, if something doesn't work,change it! Figure out what is going right when the 2 of you are getting along and do more of it.
And also: a little mystery. Do what you did when you were dating and when trying to win him back: take pride in your appearance, try new things with your hair and clothes (guys seem to like this), and KEEP DEVELOPING YOUR INTERESTS. If he hears you talking one night and says, "I never knew you were interested in World War II aviation tactics," just smile sweetly!
Don't ever appear desperate. It's ok to need him and it's ok to express that need. But the minute you start thinking he is worht more than he is or that you will die if he leaves again, it does something to your radiance. It dimishes you. You hold your chin up and keep reminding yourself, He's one lucky man.
