Re maybetime it has occurred to me after being here less than a week that this is not ethical. Well, maybe I should go back to doing things that did not work and hope for better results in the C sessions my W will not attend. Or should I somehow convince someone that worked in the mental health field for 15 years that believes counseling does not work. do I use force? Do I use manipulation? I am open to suggestions.
Re NotATLDave * All matters involving the "big 4" - your house, kids, intimacy and sex need to involve your partner which means no, 0, nada, zilch unilateral actions or decisions. Spending time on this site, unless you are at work, is an "opportunity-cost" of spending intimate time with your spouse.
Everything cost something Dave. Yes I spent too much time here for the benefit I received. Thanks for the warning.
My other option was to withdraw from the R more than I had in the past.
Would that had lead to D? i don't know. Just doing things with the tools and skills I have at this point in time.
Yes I cut back on my net time. Had to. So I believe in your "opportunity cost" to a point. I don't subscribe to the "0, nada, zilch unilateral actions or decisions" opinions. To me "0, nada, zilch unilateral actions or decisions" would lead to a "0, nada, zilch unilateral actions or decisions" relationship. Where is the improvement?
Give up what I learned here or from a book, Not likely!
