I think that you have some very good points for Dave. I am new to the board and am more of a reader than a poster. I come to it for reasons which may be different from anyone elses. That is not to say my reasons are better or worse. I would say that it is important to view all posts as you would any self-help book; and that is with critical thought. Do not assume that all that you read or hear is true or right for you.
I personally have benefitted from learning how others are communicating with their spouses.
I have also just finished the Schnarch book and this board has helped me to understand, critically consider and, to some extent, contextualize his argument. I think that without my reading on this board the book would have much less meaning as I try to consider each person's situation in light of his argument and consider his premises in light of the real-life situations that all of us are going through.
I do have some guilt about exposing my personal life to cyberspace. Not because I have any shame, but rather I feel that I maybe violating some trust between my W and I. Obviously, not enough to stay away. And honestly, I have been having these same conversations with co-workers, other men who are in similar situations as us. It is astounding how many of us there are. I also share with some very close female co-workers who are great to hear from. They provide very good perspective.
So I ask myself which is worse, reading your stories and occasionally chiming in and even less frequently sharing mine, or sharing these same conversations at work?
Bottom line is that the positives of my participation on this board out weigh the negatives, at least for now.
