CloePD's Thread

[MJontheMend]

I recently read this quote "The moralist believes that happiness comes from duty. The immoralist believes that happiness is a duty.". I think your posts indicate that you are stuck on the same hamster wheel as many of the other high drive folks on this board that results from trying to be a moralist and an immoralist at the same time. I think what everyone has been trying to communicate to you with their "Don't have a baby!" warnings is that your belief that "Marriage is forever." is nothing compared to having children in terms of keeping you stuck on the "moralist" side of the hamster wheel. The fact of the matter is marriage isn't necessarily forever and someone as young as you would probably have a much easier time finding someone else to love and have babies with than trying to adequately resolve the sexual problems in your current marriage. That is how tough it is to resolve this problem. Even though things are going relatively well for me at the moment, if you were my baby sister I would still give you the advice that you should DEFINITELY take a strong stand on the sexual issue BEFORE you have babies because it will be much, much tougher to do once you are a family, not simply a couple. Just imagine yourself having the thought "I left my first husband because he had a low sex drive and I have a high sex drive." vs. having the thought "I deprived my child of a father in the home because I wanted to get laid.".