well muddle, your in a catch 22. i promise you if she leaves without you telling her your point of view. she will then say well you didnt love me enough to stop me from going. where do you go from here? i guess that is the question you have to answer. you have to decide what that is before she leaves, and then tell her what that is, she really needs to know before she leaves. you did tell her early on that you would not accept her going, have you continued to let her know that. you said you gave her an unltamatum, and was affaid of that after you gave it to her. i promise you that if she leaves, you will not be able to work, focus on life, you will not be able to do anything but think what are they doing right now, it will drive you nuts. i do feel you need to make a decision before she leaves as to what you will do if she does. muddle the tree has to be shook, the cage has to be rattled, either way, she is going to turn it against you, but atleast if she does not go, then she wont have the guilt of that. i think all this bickering between you two is not good for you sitch. in a way i bet she feels you are making her feel stupid, by your actions. i would tell her how you feel about this, and then leave it alone. do not let her bring you into her world of fighting.
