I think the lack of respect thing is a prime example of perception problems. I’ve always respected my W immensely. So. Why was her perception so different?
Somehow, I wasn’t able to convey that respect in a way that she could understand.
FS,
I think you’ve hit upon another aspect of the problem. Once a person has a certain perception, it’s cast in stone. And, as I’ve said before, you can’t blast it away. You can only chip away at it with a teaspoon.
The perceptions that I outlined in my 1st post were pretty much the way things stood 1 � years ago (at least, I think they were). Things have changed a lot since then. But again, that’s only my perception! There were times when I really thought we’d left the past behind us only to find out that we hadn’t.
Yesterday, we had a minor disagreement. We easily worked it out, but I saw a flash of anger in her face when I disagreed with her. It was only a flash but it just showed that deep down inside, she felt that I didn’t respect her opinion. She couldn’t help but revert to the old perception.
FS, it sounds to me like your H is stuck in the same mindset. If his reactions have changed from anger to irritation, then I think you’re on the right track.
Of course, all of this is only my perception of the situation.
