John: After a 3 month separation my H came home last month. Said he broke up with OW he was living with. I thught my prayers were answered. My situation was nearly identical to yours, just substitute H for W & S for D. H told me & kids he loved us & wanted to reconcile - I helped him move stuff from apt - he told me he felt nothing for any of it. Was withdrawn a bit & sad over breakup. Agreed to work it out in counselling. Was very loving with me, but paid little attention to kids. Did nothing to resolve bad feelings with S (19) who he had hurt badly (tried to take out RO on him with no good reason). I tried to get him to admit a few things, but he was not ready. He did not last a week - ran back to apt & OW 3 days before Christmas - we were crushed! I did nothing to cause this, nor could I stop him! You can't either. Try to be understanding & kind, but set boundaries. Seeing them flee again after thinking you had them back is extremely painful for the whole family, but my kids (like yours) feel we are better off without him for now - he is too depressed & it is stressful for kids. Don't know if that helps, but that is what happened here. Barb
