I knew all that! It’s just having the self-discipline to do it, that is the tough part.
When she came in tonight talking about evicting the tenant so that she could move in, I stopped her in her tracks and told her that I was not going to throw out my tenant. This is business. She offered to give me money for her car and health insurance since December and I still haven’t seen dime one. How could I trust her. I told her she could move out, but not in our house. (just short of telling her to go back to OM) How could I expect her to pay me rent. Besides, this is the core of our problem right now. She felt pressured, so instead of saying “John, I’m feeling pressured. Lay off a little.”, she said “John, I’m feeling pressured. I’m moving.” If she had asked me to lay off, I would have laid off. Just set the boundaries and TALK to me before your anger escalates into drastic actions.
I told her that before she makes any more life altering decisions, that she should try communicating with me. It might just work.. I said that I understand that she is depressed and has no feeling for me. I asked her to give her counseling a chance. My speech was met with silence, instead of an argument. That’s a good sign.
I asked her to wake me when she gets home from work tonight and we can talk about it a little more. I think that it worked, but I’ve been wrong before. I’m not ready to give up just yet.
