when BB watches The Lifetime Channel on TV her comments about men in general follow the lines "Men are controlling/pigs/selfish. My take on the channel is they portray a lot of people ( mostly men but some women) acting out mentally unstable behaviors. It doesn't help our R, but maybe she comments on lots of things I should ignore.
Lol. Well, I find it interesting that she watches the Lifetime channel. They have a lot of "romance" movies on there, but yes, also lots of men and women acting out dysfunctional behaviors. Maybe it reinforces some of her belief system and she really likes that. I know you said you should ignore it, but if it was me I'd probably ask about it. Confront her on her statement. "If men are selfish controlling pigs, why do you want to keep watching shows that reinforce that belief? Does it make you feel better or worse?" Or you could turn it around on you, and say "I feel like you look at me in a bad light after watching shows like that. It makes me feel like I'm disappointing you in some way. What do you think?"
Something like that anyways. Or you could just say "oh."
I suggested the OW being younger might be the reason the H left, but to consider the cumulative effects of getting turned down, especially if the H was easy-going and not demanding.
Lol, they must have loved you in that board. Messing with their self-protecting perceptions.
I am Guilty LFL. A long time ago I was too busy with trying to earn money to pay for everything when BB was a SAHM. She was showing PO'ed signals but wanted sex. She told me 20+ years later.
Yes, I missed read many mixed messages. I still do because the messages are so complicated.
This is gold Lou. Good for the young guys on this board to realize too. Your W, 20 years later, still remembering how you did not ASSERT yourself when she gave you mixed signals.
SHE WAS SHOWING PO'D SIGNALS BUT STILL WANTED SEX.
See, that was right out of your W's mouth. She did want sex but wasn't able to show it outwardly and it came out all wrong, pissy, avoidant, whatever.
Lots of women probably do this. I do. And just like your W, I WANT my H to be assertive enough to read thru the BS and take charge a little. Not retreat, not avoid, not sulk. etc Too many men on here do that and it makes the situation so much worse.
Sure the women should not be giving such mixed signals, but that's reality. WE DO!
Need to work with watcha gots.