thanks for the encouraging and thought-provoking responses.
yeah, i've considered the "newness aphrodesiac" as a possible explaination... which michelle covers. but that does not account for women who truly are LD in one relationship and HD in another... even over time. the other depressing conclusion of the "newness aphrodesiac" is that my F is still very sexual - just not towards me. and for whatever reason, she only fantasizes about "the unfamiliar". i know she loves me... but i think this is possible too. and a clear indication that she is either in the wrong relationship or should not be in one at all.
bottom line - is that i think it *is* me. but i can't help it because she is attracted to either 1) newness, or 2) me - when i was confident (i.e. "alpha"?) but confidence is stripped when sex is taken away. she ultimately i think the solution is in her hands, but there's no way she can know that.
i've been thinking alot about this "alpha male" thing lately. i really hate the theory because it leaves no room for the 'sensative guy'. but it seems to make a lot sense. can a sensative guy act the 'alpha' role to help contribute to his W or F's desire?
i guess this is really off topic now. but at this point what i'm saying is - i think it IS me. and in many cases, i wonder if it is the HD guy's fault for not turning his W or F on in the right way...
