Lil, If he had been in open communication with his ex I don't know about bf's X but I suspect hearing about your bf's medical/work issues either from bf or through the girls, would make little difference, unless he negotiated changes to any legal requirement [as] things changed for your bf. That is if Xw would have agreed to some changes.
People tend to use what is to their advantage and if XW has a court or divorce agreement for XXX dollars a month and she is mostly interested in her own good, the agreement proves she is justified in her actions.
With the XW getting the D and your bf feeling like he was wronged, I can see his reluctance to talk with the XW. I can imagine feeling like I would be opening a can of worms when trying to work things out with her, so might do the other common thing, use a third party. I know it is not right, but it's done more than it should be.
it might have made a difference. OTOH from what I've heard about her, it might not have I go for the it might not have. because she is not trying to get him back.
I suspect the XW knows bf's mother will or could help him, especially if there is a threat of jail.
How much of the threat of "jail time" is really only a bluff or tough sounding legal talk in your state?
The kids I worked with that were over 18 (jail time eligible) knew the legal system did not want to put some of then in jail. The legal system mostly wanted the financial obligations to be pair off. Some kids got 10 days but served 3 because the jail got a higher offence criminal in, so the jail released small fry early.
I even got calls from judges saying the county did not want to spend the money for jail time for some cases if we could come up with a plan for community service.
I know your state is is not MT. Just thought I would tell you what goes on behind the scene sometimes. I suspect the XW would rather have the money.
although I suspect our reasons would be slightly different I would say you are right. Bf has made many improvements, so the reasons for backing off or ending the R would be different.
