Intimacy to me means being my true self in front of my S and vice versa. As it is now, I feel like both of us hide our true selves because we do not accept each other for being so....different, I guess.
Just wanted to add that I agreed with your response about the EC not really leading you to ML. I am the same way. I think this is probably related to the above response. EC with my H doesn't feel like True EC in the sense that we cannot be totally open to each other without repercussions. Thus, can't reach that comfort level you mentioned, seems less than authentic. A few people mentioned scheduled sex as being similar to date nights. I don't think that is applicable. My H and I have no problem whatsoever being cuddly, talking, holding hands, going out to eat and the movies, etc, but the sexuality piece does NOT flow out of that. It is totally a separate entity, unfortunately. Another reason why I always hated those women's mags that would tell you to "plan a romantic" night. Just not that simple.
