__________________________________________________________ The rest of the stuff we do together is always fun and as far a s I know we both enjoy it. We went to Paris two years ago and had a great time. And, no, there was no sex. Yes, I know not even in Paris. __________________________________________________________
This would have cut me to the quick. I think I would have come back from a trip like that simply knowing that it was over. When you were there in Paris, did it occur to you that your W might want sex? Did you consider giving her sex as an act of love even if you weren't so interested. Is it possible that having sex with your W more regularly would build your interest.
Please excuse us for being so prying but the HDW's here know exactly how hurt your W must be and want desperately to understand how their H's can love them and not want them.
Is it normal for people married 10 years to see someone else and feel sexually interested. Certainly. However, that same interest can be turned into your own R with a little cognitive effort. Mmmmmmm - that lady in the denim shorts looks hot....wonder how my W would look in a pair of shorts like that or I remember when W used to have a pair of shorts like that.... See what I mean?
It does go back to the Madonna/Whore issue. I often think that is exactly what my H has against kissing me passionately. You don't kiss the Madonna like that. You give her a nice chaste peck to demonstrate your respect. Those of us who are forced into the position of Madonna get awfully resentful and some of us have acted out at least in part because of it. If you want your wife back things need to change.
Where have you and she left things? Have you discussed with her a willingness to see a Dr and a sex therapist? Have you told her you don't want to lose her?
I realize that you are in pain too. Many people are able to come back from this pain and change their M into more than they ever thought was possible.
