Thanks Andy. Your're making a lot of sense.
I agree that my H's 2nd take "action" was more important than the kneejerk "reaction". I'm so glad I thought more about it. We're both acting quite differnetly than we used to. (long way to go yet). I see that, but I don't know if H does. The fact that he's here says a little something about that, I guess.

Thanks for the "audio" clue, too (Kinda like Rock'n'Roll Jeopardy) [Smile]

I really want to know more about my H's needs, and I think asking right out would freak him, because of where he is at, he has said he doesn't know what they are. It's gonna be a time thing, for sure. He loaned me his car (and some CD's)this week, and he said I could go to the house to do my laundry - I think I might try to "get in his shoes" - I was thinking of listening to the CD's or at spend time at the house. Really try to get a feel for things from his POV. I know him really well, almost so much that I should return to that beginners mind again, I think - in all sanctioned and legal ways, I promise- [Big Grin] [Big Grin]

Thanks,

LeeP

[ May 16, 2002, 11:29 AM: Message edited by: LeeP ]