Had my first workout at the gym today. Went fairly well, but I found out how out of shape I really am. It helped me not think about the A, for a little while, although it did creep in my mind ever so slightly. Also went swimming after putting the girls to bed - when I say swimming, I mostly just float around with my ears underwater - the sensory deprivation is rather meditatively theraputic.
The night was going fairly well, until just before I'm about to go to bed, W asks me to review her Spanish II composition. She had to write about something that had a big impact or important event in her life. She was going to pick an op ed article she'd written for a contest, but changed to writing about our girls. Man, I wonder if she knew what she just did to me by writing what she did. She wrote about how we struggled to get pregnant, but never gave up hope. About how before we had the girls, we did lots of things together, saw our friends a lot, and travelled. Now, we go to family restaurants and hang out with friends of the girls (ie. other families with kids). She goes on about how we used to see her distant family a lot (California & Connecticut), and how we used to go on family trips with them. Then, the girls arrived and things got difficult, her family was far away, and we were busy with all the little things. "But, we were happy," she says. Then, she mentions how she thought the changes were permanent, "I was wrong! Now, things are different, but better than before." Her family now comes here for festivities, and we're going to be going on a family trip in August to Vermont, but *with* our twins this time; and, we are starting to see our friends again, in places we can bring the girls. "Things are different, but better than before. I am looking forward to the changes in the future."
I so want to read something into the fact she wrote that - particularly the last part. But, I don't know what. Is she trying to send me a signal about us? Is she unintentially sending a signal about her and OM? Did she just randomly pick the topic and make up a bunch of crap to get the composition done? (there were a few items that didn't jibe, and she's made up stuff before just to get her homework done) Well, since I won't be able to figure it out, I'm just going to not try, assuming it's that last one - random. I just ended up telling her the content looked good, but I couldn't help with the correctness of the Spanish tonight. ... and now I head to bed.
RC
P.S. She heads out tomorrow for her out-of-town trip for that archaeology dig. You might see me whine a bit this weekend, being worried she's meeting up with OM. Apologies in advance.
It helped me not think about the A, for a little while, although it did creep in my mind ever so slightly. Also went swimming after putting the girls to bed - when I say swimming, I mostly just float around with my ears underwater - the sensory deprivation is rather meditatively theraputic.