Quote: In fact, I'm trying to think of a way that I can just get out of the house almost every night after putting the girls to bed, without telling her in any way, shape, or form where I'm going or what I'm doing. I would in actuality just be going down to Starbucks, the park, or anywhere I could just be out of the house, even if alone. I've thought of just saying "I'm heading out. I'll have my cell phone and can be back within 5 minutes if you need me."
This is what I did too. Actually, this and I took up jogging. I KNOW she saw through both as just an excuse to get away but I didn't care. I needed time to process all this and to just be by myself. I have NEVER done that in my entire life so it was a BIG 180 for me.
Quote: First step is probably to not worry about her reading my screen when walking around - about all she'll be able to see is a big "DivorceBusting.com" web page header. Next, I'll probably just start reading the books out in the open - I'm already not worrying so much about keeping them out of sight, as the girls pulled them out the other day while playing in our bedroom. The stuff about having passwords set and whatnot, I'm not so much uncomfortable about as just upset to be put in this position where I feel I have to protect my own data, now.
Well, honestly, I did not ever read DB in front of her and I am still "hiding" passionate marriage mainly because W does not really like the whole self-help thing and I don't really want to discuss it with her right now. I know OT has told me that I may be wrong about W's feelings on the subject but for now, my reading habits are kept in the dark from W.
Quote: P.S. Been one week after my first attempt at stopping snooping - have done pretty good, except for aforemention regression. It's all I can do to keep from reading her email to see if they are indeed meeting up when she's out of town.
Good, keep this up. As for figuring out if they are meeting, why not assume they are and go from there. That's what I did. Not to be negative about it but I just assumed the worst and then detached from it. It was easier that way and really helped me not snoop. Snooping would only likely confirm what I already "knew" so why do it. Assume the worst and prepare for the best. It's worked for me so far...
