not much to update about. w has moved some small things out but is still sleeping here. i will miss her when she leaves but understand that it has to happen. we have been getting along very well the last several days. i has taken me a long time to understand what w really wants. i am ready to give her that now. it took me sooo long to realize that, and that is why were where were at. i am trying to give her space, it will be easier when she moves out. really nothing new to my sitch.
You sound much better. I hope that while you finally "get it" about what your W wants and are taking steps to give it to her, you are also taking stock of what YOU want and are making plans to get that too.
Please, post and journal your life through all this. We are, as always, here to help if you need us.
you know gh i dont even know what i want, i am pretty depressed about this hole thing right now. i am so down that it has to come to this again. i will give her what she has asked me, i will not let her see my depression, but it is breathing and living in my sole right now and it is getting worse for me to handle. thank god i have kids to stick around for, that is what i am focusing my attion on. i have aloud myself to be in this state of mind, i just can not find away to get out of it. i will some how some way. i truly dont know what is in store for me in life. just some very hard times right now. sorry but this is starting to break me up pretty bad, i try not to let it but it is, its killing me slowly.
I am not one to advise meds that often, but if you are truly depressed, maybe you should seek medical help and maybe get on some anti-depressants. I know there are MANY people here who swear by them as a way to get through the roughest parts of the sitch.
I hope you feel better soon, and like I said, keep posting even if you don't think you have anything new to say.
i have been reading crazedmoms thread, it seems like she is so much like my wife, it scares the hell out of me. i dont know if it is my wifes case, (she says it isnt) but the simularties are pretty close. i truly dont understand why w is needing to leave again, it has been a month and a half since she broke things off with om, is she regretting it i dont know, only she knows, she says not though. she says it was the worst thing she has ever done and regrets it everyday. but those are just words, she has not proven that to me. your mind everyones mind, plays out things that may or may not be the case, is my w crazemom, i dont know, or is what she is telling me the truth that she loves me dosnt want divorced, always wants me in her life, that she just needs time to forgive herself and learn how to live with me again, wants to find a way to come back to me. you know every sitch is different, some s are there all the time and others never see thier s. witch is easier to handle, its like the grass is greener on the other side of the fence thing. i see my w everyday, i have sex with my w often, but i dont get any love from her. she is not depositing anything in my love bank, she is not giving me any security, which is all i want. you know gh you want intimancy with you w, and that is driving you nuts, were all different in what we really want. my w is giving one day and taking many days later, then one day gives, and so on and so on. she knows she is a taker right now, hates that fact but does it anyway. i am just rambling on and on, my head comes up with so much things its is really driving me nuts, i am only human, i try not to let all this way on me, try to take advice from everyone in here, i believe all that has been said to me, but i can not accept it, my sitch is different, wrong, its just like everyone elses, but i still dont believe it. its going to be a long road for me, one i will always travel until its over, and that will be when, either she comes back to me or files for divorce. until that day i will stay on the black train, try to learn along the way, do things for myself, which will be hard and wait and see how it turns out. thanks for helping and reading my messed up life.
Quote: its going to be a long road for me, one i will always travel until its over, and that will be when, either she comes back to me or files for divorce. until that day i will stay on the black train, try to learn along the way, do things for myself, which will be hard and wait and see how it turns out.
Good for you - you finally committed to doing what you want to do for yourself in this situation. In so doing, you have liberated yourself from your W's choices and personal ordeal. I have no doubt that this has given you a new perspective. One that allows you to see the situation without your own emotions clouding your vision. I have no doubt that if you keep your resolve and follow through on this commitment you made here, you will succeed, no matter what form this success takes!
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
